I've worked with women who are grieving a pregnancy loss or infant loss.
It can be heartbreaking to yearn for the presence of your loved one. Losing a baby is likely the greatest heartache a person can go through. My women talk about an emptiness that lingers, and while the grief changes, the emptiness honors a space of a special being that should be here with them right now.
It can be especially painful to grieve your dreams and visions in your bond and connection with your baby..
Here's one way you can begin to work through your current grief, even though we all know that sadness will come up from time to time, the heaviness of the grief can really lift if you allow yourself to get in touch with it instead of running away from it.
❤️ Write a letter to the baby you've lost (this can also be effective for grief of losing a parent, grandparent, friend, etc.)
-Do this everyday for 20-30 minutes per day.
-Give yourself permission to "turn on the faucet" and pour out all of your emotions during this grieving session (guilt, regret, anger, sadness, loneliness, etc.)
-After the 20-30 minutes, give yourself permission to turn off the faucet and move forward with the day until the next grieving session.
-Do this everyday until it starts to feel a bit lighter for you. Once you feel like you've gathered themes of what you'd like to say to them, write a letter FROM your baby/child in response to the messages you've written to them.
*It can be challenging because they didn’t have words, but give it a shot to channel what your child would say in response to your letter, and you’ll be surprised of the words that beign to fill the paper. This can help you gain closure and keep their message with you.
❤️ Light a candle for your baby.
This grief is often overwhelming and even unbearable, but applying some tools can begin to help you heal. If you need support and guidance through it, I'm here.
Hi, I'm Thai-An. I'm a postpartum therapist and mother who is passionate about helping pregnant and postpartum parents overcome depression and anxiety so they can feel like themselves again and enjoy life with their baby and family. After overcoming my own battle with postpartum depression and anxiety, I opened Lasting Change Therapy, LLC in South Oklahoma City to dedicate my counseling practice to helping families have postpartum recovery and wellness, and I love it!